Read on for all our favorite moments.
EPISODE 1: Kimmy Goes Roller Skating!
The second season ofUnbreakable Kimmy Schmidtopens with a timely event: Christmas.
Credit: Eric Liebowitz/Netflix
Im so lost… Oh!Flash-forward.
As our hopelessly 90s-recovering mole woman heroine might say: Psych!
Kimmy (Ellie Kemper) shows off stockings for our assembled characters (and someone named… Murasaki?
), a dude in a Santa suit arrives.
The Jews took my painting!
And Kimmys former GED classmate Sonja (Suzan Perry) climbs through the window and threatens her.
Ho, ho, ho, you ho!
Im going to kill you!
What the fudge is going on?
Kimmy is pining for Dong (Ki Hong Lee), now in a Green Card marriage to Sonja.
It would be bad to pursue him, right?
Wrong, insists Lillian (Carol Kane).
alleged murderer Robert Durst, the subject of the HBO docu-seriesThe Life and Deaths of RobertDurst.
She and Dong roll apart, while Lillian and Bobby skate on.
Hes getting divorced from Vonda (Pernell Walker), his best friend from his Mississippi childhood.
That was the day Ronald Effing Wilkerson became Titus Andromedon.
Not only were they already technically divorced, but Vonda probably owed Titus money.
Titus skipped away gleefully and Kimmy was pissed.
Is this how he solved all of his problems?
By skating away from moral responsibility and mistakes?
Did he have no empathy for Vondas heartbreak?
Titus didnt think so.
Am I the only person in this city who doesnt do whatevs whenevs?
Well fudge that sugar!
Fudge it to heck!
With that, Kimmy resolves to get it on with Dong.
Has Jacqueline been born again?
Or has that vision sparked at least a small want for redemptive change?
So does Dongs conscience.
Would Kimmy consider waiting on him for, like, two years?
Her mouth says Yes.
Everything else says Sad.
Still, the experience reconnects Kimmy with her moral center.
But Kimmy isnt the only one ending this episode by breaking good instead of breaking bad.
In truth, Titus is running after Vonda in hopes of atoning.
And their choreography istight.
ProblemsKimmyhas to solve:Getting Dong back.
Getting Titus to grow a conscience.
Getting back in touch with her own.
KimmysChristmas party explained:Murasaki is one of Titus many past lives/multiple personalities.
And in case you forgot who Sonja was, youve been reminded.
Jacqueline doesnt understand how the world works:She certainly doesnt understand how her Sioux culture works.
See: using a dream-catcher as a weapon to fire nightmares at her parents.
Lillian doesnt understand how the world works:Depends if you agree with her embrace of moral relativism.
The wheels come off, they do it all in one weekend and drop dead.
Here, we say, Eh, so I kissed a priest in a leather bar.
Who am I hurting?
Kimmyloves the90s:Psych!
Titus preferred men like Tim Meadows.
Vonda preferred skinny white boys like David Spade.
(Both liked Hootie and the Blowfish.)
Runner-up: Watching all five of the aunties who raised Titus keel over from strokes at his wedding reception.
Yes, Titus said…Get NSync, Kimberlake!
I gotta go get divorced!
Estimated number of pop culture references:At least 20.
(Were going to count themanymanymanyKardashian references as one.)
Other favorites:
Kimmy(genuinely flattered): THANK YOU!
Jeff Jensen
NEXT: Episode 2
EPISODE 2:Kimmy Goes on a Playdate!
Kimmy stumbles upon a year-round Christmas store and thinks:I must go to there.
They say theres a war on Christmas.
Shes bent on recouping the bennies of high society living.
Whats the hardest thing for a trophy wife to do?
Im going to get it all back.
The two moms (oh yeah!
Jacqueline has a kid!)
Jacqueline brags on her handbag made of famous Internet cats.
I can never tell if youre trying to help me or if youre trying to destroy me!
Buckley isnt the only Voorhees child Kimmy has to nanny anew.
She hates Kimmy for being the catalyst for her destabilizing life change.
Being the cause of Xans Connecticut captivity and unhappiness gets Kimmy to doubt her goodness.
Is she to Xan what evil Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne was to her?
The wise young mope sees through Kimmys scheme and she loves her for it.
As for Jacqueline, her scheme to re-climb the social ladder costs her dearly.
She buys a Mondrian for $11.5 million or 96 percent of her divorce settlement.
Mrs. White basks in the awe of the elite, even as her eyes pop with Oopsy!
Titus is in this episode, too!
I thought your clothes were beautiful, says Mikey, who asks Titus for his digits.
You remind me of Carlos Del Gato from the Mets.
Titus his heart swelling like a Grinch in Christmas gives up his number.
Could this be the a start of a beautiful relationship?
At least Titus knows who to ask if he wants to get into some shants.
ProblemsKimmyhas to solve:Getting steady work.
Finding a new home for the Titus collection.
Brainstorming the Buckley/Owen R. playdate.
Motivating Xan to move on with life.
She has faith that her new job hawking Christmas lights will provide spiritual illumination.
If anything can remind me whats good and right in the world its this place!
Speaking of which:
KimmysChristmas party explained:Now we know where she scored the decorations.
And its a very good chance that Jacquelines missing painting is the Mondrian she bought.
Kimmydoesnt understand how the world works:Oh, no!
Those Santas must be coming from a funeral.
Those two bearded men dressed in black were Hassidic Jews.
Also, you buy a Help Wanted sign to advertise for a job, not apply for one.
Ask Jacqueline to teach you about room service etiquette before you travel again.
Lillian doesnt understand how the world works:They filled in a sinkhole.
Now where am I supposed to number 2 when I have a gentleman caller?
Kimmyloves the90s:Her suggestions for playdate ideas were Koosh Ball,Pokemon, andTeenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Yes, Titus said…Unacceptable!
You people dont know the meaning of the word sensualatitaganza!
NEXT: Episode 3
EPISODE 3:Kimmy Goes to a Play!
Who are we, underneath?
Do we know who we are, why we do what we do?
What are our true identities?
Are those ghosts in Pac Man really ghosts?
To Jacqueline, having an identity is all about keeping up appearances, no matter the cost literally.
Without Julian, shes decided to stage her sparse apartment to make it look like its still being redecorated.
She really did take Kimmys advice, then: Julians opposite could be considered Kimmy.
Shes young, shes poor, shesfemale(and strong as hell).
But for Lillian, a change in identity isnt as easy to accept.
Gentrification in her neighborhood makes Lillian feel like shes losing herself a painted-over graffiti mural of Notorious B.I.G.
Butpsych: F105 is really just Fios, as in the high-speed Internet being integrated into the area.
Which means… if the place really is changing for the better, should Lillian be?
If its no longer dangerous, can Lillian survive?
(Its no wonder he missed the no face journeys sign in the library.)
Luckily, Titus oops, Murasaki wins them over with a rendition of a classic folk song.
Take that, haters!
Making the Internet (made of Chandlers) apologize for trashing Titus one-man show before seeing it.
Finding a duck to bring to Jacqueline (thanks, autocorrect!).
Getting Jacqueline to stop turning into Julian and ruining a poor dog masseuses life.
Playing the part of Jacquelines wedding date.
She gets her dog a massage because she cannot have a stressed out dog.
She takes the histrionic Mimi Kanasis hello again, Amy Sedaris!
out to pick up old, rich men with skin tied in knots to help freshen up their visages.
(Could Cersei and Jaime finally make it, just in New York?
Ha, imaginethatcrossover.)
Yeah, its an honest mistake… for Lillian.
She spray paints Biggie by herself, honoring him with a, well, minimalist drawing.
to when Aisha Tyler recurred in the early 00s.
Well, if Aisha Tyler can play a white woman onFriends, then I guess its okay.
Yes, Titus said…My shows on the Internet, where Beyonce and the president live.
The thing is, Titus does indeed beautifully sing theTakeda Lullaby, a classic folk song.
Estimated number of pop culture references:7.
(Stockings for Cyrus, Alphonse, and the pug wouldve been overkill.)
Shirley Li
NEXT: Episode 4
EPISODE 4:Kimmy Kidnaps Gretchen!
Gretchen rents a bus, recruits some followers, and begins a new life.
Meanwhile, Titus and Mikey are going on their first date.
Mikey tells her that Titus is just too complicated for him right now.
The two decide to give it another try, and they kiss as Kimmy and Lillian watch through keyholes.
Lillian took Mikeys multi-tool and planted it at the apartment to lure him back.
This was her design.
ProblemsKimmyhas to solve:Helping Titus get ready for his date.
Keeping Gretchen from the Church of Cosmetology.
Helping Gretchen chart her own path.
Guest stars:Steve Buscemi, Patrick Stewart, and Kelsey Grammer lend their voices to Gretchens app.
Dean Winters stars in show-within-a-showBunny and Kitty.
Kimmydoesnt understand how the world works:She thinks MILF stands for My Interesting Lady Friend.
Mikeydoesnt understand how the world works:Which one of us opens doors for the other?
Or are there no doors?
Do we not use doors?
Gretchen doesnt understand how the world works:At all.
Yes, Titus said…I once went to a Halloween party dressed as Nathan Lane Bryant.
It was moderately well received.
Viral video moment:Kimmys Bunny and Kitty song is both adorable and catchy.
(Solving mysteries one hug at a time.)
Lillian:His name is Robert Durst, and he only did that because he likes you.
Kelly Connolly
NEXT: Episode 5
EPISODE 5:Kimmy Gives Up!
Kimmys all ready to take and ace the GED.
Problem is, the GED office only has a confirmation letter for one student and its Dong.
(Kimmys letter was at home in Titus Quest Diagnostic Barbie chalet.)
This is difficult seeing as their relationship is, well, not real.
Thats all you oughta prove that youre truly in love, right?
It works, but Kimmy realizes she cant keep waiting on Dong.
She has to move on with her life, so she deletes his number from her phone.
(Oh, by the way: Kimmy falls asleep taking the GED and fails.
Next times a charm?)
Meanwhile, Titus love life is flourishing.
ProblemsKimmyhas to solve:Getting Dong his GED confirmation letter.
Making sure Dong doesnt get deported.
Moving on from Dong.
I cant wear a green scrunchie on Thursday, she reasons.
Everyone will think Im horny.
Best flashback:Lillian tells Kimmy, You cant keep running into a brick wall.
How does the Kool-Aid man do this?
she breathlessly utters after slamming herself against the hard surface in the clip.
Good question, Kimmy.
Thing are finally breaking in Kimmy and Jacquelines relationship.
Because hes sans legitimacy, his shop goes out of business just as they arrive.
Jacqueline continues to treat Kimmy poorly, causing her to uncharacteristically snap and insist on being paid.
Jacqueline begrudgingly agrees, because youre my employee, and nothing more.
It takes rock bottom for her to consider acting a little more Kimmy-like and be nice.
During a rough bus ride, she spies Linda, the receptionist she berated earlier.
After Linda breaks her heel, Jacqueline literally puts herself in Lindas shoes, and vice versa.
She and Kimmy end up on good terms; as the employer-worker relationship ends, their friendship resumes.
Lets see how Kimmy: Uber driver turns out.
Meanwhile: Hipsters attack!
All Titus wants is to buy capes with his Airbnb money from the costume shop down the street.
But finds out Pawn Werlt was a victim of gentrification and has become a vape shop.
Though the Airbnb couple leave broken, a new crop of hipsters appear to sneak into the purported speakeasy.
ProblemsKimmyhas to solve:Balancing work at the Christmas store and providing free, unappreciated labor for Jacqueline.
Guest stars:SNLs Kenan Thompson appears in a flashback as Roland.
That one can simply land a same-day dental appointment in a big city.
She believes Malcolm X was a rapper.
Kimmydoesnt understand how the world works:Wi-Fi is a mystery.
She thinks that newspaper are a thing and the classifieds section are confidential.
In trying to correct Jacqueline, Kimmy refers to Malcolm X as Malcolm the 10th, a Black Pope.
And those tubes are filled with the Internet, and its coming here through the air.
(Val Kilmer was her hottie of choice in one of the jokes.)
She impersonates Jacqueline in a distinctMrs.Doubtfirevoice.
Her middle name on her learners permit is Cougar, an homage to rocker John Mellencamp.
The apartment has a Columbia House subscription.
Kimmy is stoked to receive astretchy sticky handfrom Jacqueline.
Yes, Titus said…just, whats scary about books?
Estimated number of pop culture references:6, including Kimmy wanting Jacqueline to play the KITT to her Michael Knight.
The real highlight was … Will Robinson
NEXT: Episode 7
EPISODE 7:Kimmy Walks Into a Bar!
(No, not a typo.
Her gala is to raise awareness for lupus awareness.)
Things take a turn for the worse when the attendees realize that the event is to benefit Native Americans.
That private island where people like me go to dress like turtles and do stuff to turtles.
But thanks to Kimmy leaving Jacquelines garment bag at the bar, Keith is able to track her down.
(Phew, crisis averted!)
In the end though, Kimmy ends up taking Keith to the gala.
It turns out though that Mikey isnt really like that.
Soon, they find a happy compromise.
Problems Kimmy has to solve:Getting Jacquelines gala dress back after she left it at a bar.
Getting Keiths phone number after meeting him at that bar.
Helping Jacqueline bring her gala together at the last minute.
Dealing with her triggers from her traumatic past (but shes not quite there yet).
She thinks men find funny women disgusting.
Shes baffled to find out that poor people dont even do gala season.
She rolls herself up in a rug because she doesnt want to face her problems.
Kimmy loves the 90s:She makes a shoutout to a certainHome Improvementstar.
I dont have time to slow down.
Ive missed too much already…Jonathan Taylor Thomas making the transition to adult movie star, I assume.
Yes, Titus said…Im not the one who assumed all gay people know how to arrange flowers.
Why dont you do some prop comedy, Carrot Top?
C. Molly Smith
NEXT: Episode 8
EPISODE 8:Kimmy Goes to a Hotel!
Hey, remember that disastrous Christmas party we saw at the beginning of the season?
Mimi is there because she had nowhere to go on Fake Christmas, and Kimmy felt sorry for her.
We now know who Murasaki is (even if she doesnt do Christmas).
And Sonja is angrily climbing through Kimmys window to confront her about the scrunchie she found under Dongs pillow.
You know, Freddy Krueger style.
At least its not that gross butt-shaped hot tub.
Trying to confront her intimacy problems.
Titus doesnt understand how the world works:But those papers have numbers on them, Rick!
The most boring of all the shapes!
But its HIS creek!
Devan Coggan
NEXT: Episode 9
EPISODE 9:Kimmy Meets a Drunk Lady!
Thats how we first meet Andrea, who screams Yeah, Malala!
at the notion of a female Uber driver.
While Kimmy is driving around after her fight with Titus, Andrea requests another Uber ride from her.
The self-blackmail works, and Andrea agrees to become Kimmys therapist.
Youve got some bad stuff inside, and your body is trying to blast it out.
Best drunk Andrea line: The couch pulls out, so I cant get pregnant!
Also,This doesnt look like where they sent Dylan McKay for his drinking problem.
Yes, Titus said…No wonder Jesus quit carpentry.
Its so much harder than talking on a donkey.
As episode 10 begins, Mikey is finally comfortable with his gay identity and his relationship with Titus.
Shes had a very strange life, and that may have started even before the reverend entered the picture.
Lillians protests fail even to anger anyone.
In a traditional Italian family,thisis the worst insult a son could make.
The very idea that Mikey ate beforehand is enough to make his mom scream at Lucifer.
Cause I dont, anymore.
Our gay pope seems to be for it.
So who am I to go against our gay pope?
Unfortunately for Titus plans, Mikeys dad isnt big on speeches.
The family hugs it out, cracks a few jokes, and get on with their dinner.
Kimmy has long resembled a Disney princess: colorful flowing hair, cheery attitude, easy to befriend.
Turns out Kimmys thought of this connection, too.
Even after the bunker, she still uses it to calm down her anger.
Titus disappointment with Mikeys successful coming-out goes beyond his everyday desire for drama.
Mikey realizes that this is a chance for Titus to really come out… as black.
Kimmy tries returning to her happy place, but its tainted after her experiences with Lillian.
These bunnies are surprisingly good at sadistic torture!
Together, therapist and subject realize Kimmy has unresolved issues with her mother.
Problems Kimmy has to solve:Getting to a breakthrough in therapy as soon as possible.
Learning to get angry.
She just wanted to help him get to the nursing college.
Yes, Titus said… Christian Holub
NEXT: Episode 11
EPISODE 11:Kimmy Meets a Celebrity!
But Kimmy doesnt get to finishthisbogus therapy because Cyndee Pokorny from kidnapping calls with news that shes in NYC.
Over wine glasses of whole milk, Kimmy and Cyndee catch up.
Turns out theyve both been in therapy and thats the reason Cyndees in NYC.
Kimmy watches from the audience as Dr. Dave tapes a segment with Cyndee called Superstars of Tragedy.
So Kimmy goes to talk to Dr. Dave herself about Cyndees issues.
Gay guys can have babies I saw it at the airport, Cyndee fires back.
They just come out Chinese.
Cue squeals from Cyndee, groans from Kimmy, and a look of horror from Brandon.
This reminds her of Cyndee and she doesnt give up on her friends.
So instead she starts crying.
No one is more excited about this than Brandon.
So while Cyndee wont be starting a family anytime soon, Titus is starting to think about it.
Hes growing side hair thanks to a medical trial hes being paid a whopping $20 for.
The boy, Tyler, wants help purchasing movie tickets to the R-ratedHuman Centipede 5.
He also has his fathers credit card, so Titus offers to do it for some popcorn.
Titus is confused how kids can make you feel so much.
She says the neighborhood is her child, and that kids are selfish and take you for granted.
But Titus still thinks it will be worth it.
Watch out world: There could be more Tituses Titi running around soon.
Problems Kimmy has to solve:Learning to talk to her mother.
Stopping Cyndee from marrying Brandon.
Kimmy doesnt understand how the world works:People go to therapy on TV now?
Watching people h-u-m-p on your system!?
Yes, Titus said…How dare you?
Im a person who deserves respect.
I will not be treated like an animal unless its a glistening panther emerging from an infinity pool.
Your clothes dont have to be.
Delta Airlines, We hate this as much as you do.
Donaldsons Night Vision Goggles, Own the night, perv.
Spine-snap Possum Traps, When you hear the snap, you got a possum to bury.
(She threw the keys in the river to protest racism, Kimmy tells her.)
They havent even gotten to her fear of Velcro, yet!
But of course, he does get sick, and the audition becomes his second third worst one ever.
(See below for the full lyrics to his made-up Trident jingle.)
Kimmy has a plan to stop Dr. Andrea from drinking, and it starts with getting her drunk.
Before she can enact it, though, Jacqueline stops by to wonder why Russ wouldnt sleep with her.
Plus, his lease is up at the end of the month and maybe they can move in together?
Its a big step, and Titus is not a fan of steps.
She realizes she put his needs above her own… which means shes falling in love with him.
Kimmy walks in and tells them shes going to find her mother.
If she can find every gosh-dang Waldo thats crossed her path, she can do this.
Problems Kimmy has to solve:Helping Dr. Andrea stop day drinking.
Also: Seeing Tina Fey whip and nae nae.
Never forget your teeth are outside bones!
Jessica Derschowitz
NEXT: Episode 13
EPISODE 13: Kimmy Finds Her Mom!
I do it, right?
But, plot twist: The rich people are garbage people!
As Jacqueline later asks, incredulously, The Redskins?
How is that still a thing?
Over at Universal Studios, Kimmy runs into Lori-Ann played byLisa Kudrow(!!!)
Kimmy agrees: Im more than this one terrible thing that happened to me.
The mother-daughter duo decide to ride the Rip Ride Rockit together, and everything is perfect!
Years of trauma done and dusted, right?
Titus is not quite as ready to push forward.
But Kimmys not letting Titus off the hook.
And, of course, she does.
Change is scary, but no more so than stagnation.
They might have made himtoonauseating.
On the roller coaster, Kimmy finally has it out with Lori-Ann.
She was selfish, and Kimmy is mad, and, breakthrough: Im entitled to that emotion.
And I just have to accept that.
With a deep breath of relief, she repeats: I just have to accept that.
Were cool, Kimmy promises Lori-Ann, and they make plans to visit with each other over Christmas.
As they go over what theyre thankful for, Kimmys phone rings: Its Rev.
Wayne calling from jail, and hes getting married; he and Kimmy will need to get a divorce.
Wecertainly didnt know that Kimmy was married, but did Kimmy?
Problems Kimmy has to solve:Finally, her own.
In episode 12, Jacqueline and Titus learned that love is putting someone elses needs ahead of your own.
Like Sheena Eastons Sugar Walls.'
I dont want to see him like that.
He thanks NASA with a cheerful laugh: She was his slave!
Jacqueline, look: Some of my best … statues are of Indians.
Kimmy loves ball pits:Man, a ball pit is definitely my favorite kind of pit.
I think the burdens on you to prove that I havent cared about space this entire time!
See?I love space!
Estimated number of pop culture references:Four, including Kimmy mistakenly referring to SpongeBob SquarePants as Cheese Businessman.
Kimmy, under her breath:He was shot in the face by you…
Amanda Michelle Steiner
