No online grid is safe from the late-night host’s jabs
Despite this being trip No.
14 for Jimmy Kimmel to the ABC Upfronts stage, the comedians edge hasnt dulled.
Were doing well now that we started to acknowledge that minorities exist.
Credit: ABC/ Ida Mae Astute
And Tuesday was no different.
Here are Kimmels 11 best barbs from the 2016 Upfronts presentation:
1.
Theres too many [upfronts], its crazy.
Do Crackle, and Vox, and Vevo really need to have upfronts?
These arent networks: these are sound effects when Batman punches a bad guy.
Do you guys learn anything from these presentations?
ABC, as youll hear over and over again today, is the most diverse data pipe.
Ill tell you why: because the other networks are horrible racists.
Oh, we are.
Some people are saying that the connection TV is making a comeback.
All of those people are web connection executives, but they are saying it.
The good news is that with all the options out there, traditional television is still king.
So the devil is on their side.
CBS canceledCSI: Cyber, which is the last of theCSIs.
They picked up a number of new dramas, which is good, I guess.
Its amazing CBS could pick anything up considering the osteoporosis.
The average CBS viewer looks like the Red Woman fromGame of Throneswithout her necklace on.
They have Arnold Schwarzenegger at NBC.
Donald Trump is right: Immigrants are taking our jobs, starting with his.
Schwarzenegger will be the new host ofCelebrity Apprentice.I dont know about that.
ABC is different from the other networks.
We are your partners.
Lets make beautiful, green confetti together.
Ill see you next year, and from what Im told, the next two years after that.
