How do you recover from the trauma of not being able to purchase a tiny horse?
Well thats at least thats how Lisa Vanderpump chooses to operate.
She also apparently has lots of contacts with access to miniature animals.
Credit: Bravo
So now Lisa has 8 swans, 7 dogs, 2 mini horses, and 1 pig.
Its like Noahs Arc but with a lot more wine and sequins.
Erika is incredibly busy.
But then its time for her to go do Erika Jayne stuff.
I dont know about that.
Like does Blythe Danner wanna be Erika Jayne?
Blah blah blah Vince and Eileen blah blah blah poker blah blah race track blah blah.
Kyle takes her entire brood to the jewelry store for Sophia and Portia to get their ears pierced.
Does Claires Boutique no longer exist?
Dont girls get their ears pierced in malls?
Anyway, they go back to the place where Sophia previously got her ears pierced and had a meltdown.
Janet, the lady with the piercing gun, does not look psyched to have these gals back.
Janet also has not updated her hairdo in the passing years.
So Sophia flips out again.
Youd think she was being waterboarded by Janet.
Then, its Portias turn and she flips out.
I feel like maybe that hospital should have some sort of inspection.
More specifically, hes concerned about all the poop theyll create.
So much for tiny bathroom behavior.
For some reason, David and Yolanda return to their Malibu mansion.
I thought they were selling that thing?
Well in any case there was sadly no shot of that giant refrigerator or nary one lemon tree.
ITS LIKE A WORLD GONE MAD.
Yolanda has the great idea to have Erika Jayne perform with the Pope.
That sounds like the next installment inTheDaVinciCodeseries… apocalyptic kind of stuff.
Once shes done scaring the living hell out of Portia, Kyle takes her youngest to an acting class.
This was the episode where apparently everyone went to Canada.
Lisa Rinnas family headed up North without her while she sold her line at QVC.
And then Yolanda and David went to Canada and wore matching life preservers.
The other part of the trip seemed to be David wanting to do things and Yolanda declining.
But she did make him coffee!
Lisa V. finally decides its time for her pals to meet the mini horses.
So she invites over Kyle and Lisa R. and a very late Eileen.
While theyre waiting for Eileen, the girls just gossip, which of course includes Kim Richards talk.
Apparently she threw shade on Lisa V. onEntertainment Tonightwhile promoting hercritically acclaimed appearance inSharknado3.
Rinna was just full of the dickens at this little luncheon.
She then tells the gals that people are talking about Yolandas Instagram and concerned and confused.
Frankly, Im concerned about a group of women over 40 discussing some other ladys Instagram.
Rinna pulls out her phone and starts reading from the Munchausen Syndrome Wikipedia page.
Basically, she thinks Yolanda might be making herself sick and it might not by Lyme disease.
Eileen finally arrives and immediately thinks something is up.
Lisa R. tells her that there are Malibu citizens doubting Yolandas sickness.
Eileen seems let down.
Frankly, gurl, Im there with ya.
This was not a very dramatic reveal.
Dare I say it…
