And deans with an ax to grind.
We open with Chanel No.
2s time on Earth.
Credit: Patti Perret/Fox
This is what happens when you rub uglies with my man, she hisses at the open casket.
And though her remains are ostensibly cremated and shot into space (per her wishes), No.
2 isnt out of this world quite yet.
No, the girls use a ouija board to communicate with her spirit.
After all, No.
2 must know the identity of her killer, right?
(Ill bet aFresh Prince ofBel-Air-approved jacket that Boone is on the other end of the line.)
He wasnt attractive at all, Feather tells Grace and Pete.
But, I mean, he was the Beatles professor, so we started having sex.
Once or twice a week he was in his mid-50s, after all!
Mr. Munsch eventually left the Dean and moved into KKT to live with Feather.
She follows, uncovering further instructions…and body parts nailed to the walls!
She finally pushes fire up the bedroom door and discovers Mr. Munschs head in the fish tank.
Yep, hes sleeping with the fishes.
), and shes carted off in a straight jacket.
Which, of all the ridiculous things to happen on this show, somehow feels especially over the top.
Its not like the Dean ate someones liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.
And so Grace and Pete have their front-page headline: Cops Finger Dean Munsch.
Except, as theyre making out in celebration, Graces phone rings.
Its Munsch calling from the mental hospital, summoning them.
Quid pro quo, Clarice.
Before Grace and Peter leave, they meet the hospitals resident Picasso.
I paint them all, she says.
Surely a clue for episodes to come.
At the house, the Chanels have gone back to the talking board to once again chat up No.
And they test her asking for the number of tampons in No.
6s bag, which the planchette gets right.
(Answer: a staggering nine.
Who has that kind of space in her handbag?)
And then, finally, they get to the all-important question, which Chanel poses: Whos killing everybody?
The other girls now know what they must do they have to kill Chanel.
Their plots, of course, run to the absurd.
5 suggests poisoning Chanels bra.
6 proposes a sugar party, replacing Chanels serving with powdered diamonds.
But like something out of a creepy, co-edChristmas Carol, No.
and that the other Chanels are plotting her murder.
Their plan failed because they couldnt decide on a murder method.
And by killer, she means Grace and Zayday.
Grace, for her part, thinks shes solved at least one murder.
But, as you probably could have guessed, Feather didnt do it.
As the Dean helpfully reminds us: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
