Youre going to be very disappointed.
Thats what I do.
Im not a host.
Credit: NBC
I dont host things, David added.
No ones ever even been to my house.
If they did go, theyd find it extremely unpleasant.
I dont put out snacks or dips.
I cant remember the last time I had dip in my house.
I have a dipless house.
(Who throws up a brisket?
Your mother made a beautiful brisket, and thats what you do?)
Honestly, I cant wait to leave, he told the audience.
Wherever I am I want to get the hell out of there.
Watch Davids monologue below, and read EWs full recaphere.
