Is Nostradamus the original Debbie Downer?
Oh, my dear Royals.
If you have yet to watch the November 13 episode ofReign, turn back now.
Credit: Ben Mark Holzberg/The CW
Im serious: Make like Nostradamus and say something unnerving before disappearing in a fabulous fur coat.
King Francis is dead.
He is dead and there are no take-backsies this time.
To be honest, I enjoyed (is that the right word?
Oh man, Im really going to miss that guy.
IM SO SAD, YOU GUYS.
Post-resurrection, Mary and Francis are YOLTing hard (You Only Live Twice).
Or that her mother died at all, really.
Is it me, or does she seem more relieved than anything?
He may be Protestant, but hes family, ya know?
Francis cant believe Mary would even consider signing such a peace accord Marys birthright is her most precious possession.
If theres a line of 16th-century royal greeting cards, that should be on it.
They also almost immediately switch out Marys banners hanging in the throne room to remove the English line.
Kudos to you, French court banner maker, whoever you are!
Thats some quick turnaround time.
Mary has no regrets France is home.
Catherines also pretty psyched that Francis has a new lease on life.
The celebrating doesnt last very long though.
Guess whos back with some horrible news?
Why, Nostradamus, of course!
Dude sure knows how to ruin a good resurrection high.
Catherine must warn him.
The romantic gesture is not lost on Mary, who cant seem to keep her hands off her husband.
She has the carriage pull over and suggests a little skinny-dipping pit stop.
Skinny-dipping in the 1500s seems like a tall order; thats a lot of layers to rip off!
But the young monarchs are in it to win it.
They get their dip on and then THEY GET THEIR DIP ON.
Who needs Viagra when you might just die and be brought back to life by a witchs blood magic?
Theyre closer than ever before to catching the killer, and CSI Bash has Delphine to thank for that.
He thanks her with his tongue.
NEXT: Nostradamus does it again!
Francis senses somethings not right, and goes looking for Mary.
Francis takes on all of Marys captors without hesitation (where are the guards?
YOU HAVE ONE JOB).
Hes brave and gallant, but he still ends up getting his head bludgeoned into the ground repeatedly.
Im not a doctor, but Im pretty sure thats not great.
Francis still ends up fighting the last assassin off, but the damage has been done.
He knows this is the end.
Its sad, but does it feel cheapened by the death bed scene we had just last week?
Like, how many teary death-bed conversations do we need here?
Mary is grieving, too.
Shes in such shock that she cant bring herself to leave Francis there in the forest.
Catherine has to physically pull her away and the ladies hold on to each other.
Mary and Catherine agree on so little, but they both loved Francis with all of their being.
They both feel lost without him.
Theyll need to lean on one another to survive this blow.
Still wearing her gown covered in Francis blood, Mary storms in to see the English ambassador.
She vehemently accuses Elizabeth of being behind the attack.
England cannot have her birthright: England has taken enough from [her] this day.
But Mary isnt done.
And then Mary screams.
Adelaide Kane, everybody; slay on, slayer.
Narcisse has learned that the assassins were in fact not the English they were Scots.
She apologizes to Catherine and hands over the Queen of Frances crown.
Catherine makes it clear she does not blame Mary.
Mary made her son happy, and thats something.
But, I choose to believe in this moment, with her grieving daughter-in-law, Catherine was being sincere.
Nicholas, remember the last time you underestimated Mary?
HOW DID THAT WORK OUT FOR YOU, SON?
Well, Royals, here we are.
Francis is gone (unless he returns for some ghost sex like dear old dad?).
How are we feeling?
Is Catherine right: Is there no France without Francis?
(Be sure to readshowrunner Laurie McCarthys thoughtson the future ofReignwithout him.)
Outfit of the Week:On any normal week, Nostradamus fur would win this contest hands down.
But this is not a normal week.
The image of Marys gown, stained with Francis blood, will stay with me for a long time.
The Queens Corner of Harsh Lady Truths:
