The gals of theReal Housewives of New Yorkare back.
Were down one shapewear creator (Heather) but were up one Asian Jewish lady (Jules).
So we open with last years rookie Dorinda back for a second season and visiting Bethennys new apartment.
Credit: Bravo
Its a really amazing apartment.
but Bethenny calls B.S.she saw Dorinda do-rinking in the Hamptons.
Shes apparently quite sunny, which will naturally not last with this group.
Carole now has a baby.
Well she has a puppy named Baby.
On the opposite end of the spectrum is Ramona whos single aside from a big new pair of boobs.
Shes hitting up bars with her lady friends and mispronouncing the wait staffs names.
Basically, shes YOLO-ing or whatever the YOLO equivalent is on the Upper East Side.
And shes super psyched that Avery is 21 so she can come to the bars with her.
But Avery is not real into men buying her mother drinks or watching her mother flirting.
Well, Avery, you better buckle up.
Meanwhile, Sonja has a new intern named Juliona, which Im pretty sure is a made up name.
Also WHERE IS PICKLES?
Sonjas upstairs painting furniture when Luann stops by to announce shes going to stay the night there.
It seems that Luann has a date and wants a place to crash.
But Sonja is not cool with her bringing back a date to the house.
This isnt Turks and Caicos, Countess!
Somehow the conversation turns to Luann being part Native American and having more teeth than the average person.
This appalls Sonja because it really impacts Luanns oral sex life.
Then, we get a nice confessional where Sonja explains how one performs oral sex.
What a time to be alive.
And Bethenny admits she recently saw Sonja and Luann the drunkest shes ever seen them.
This season is sounding a littleLeaving Las Vegasbut with more furry vests.
Now its time to meet Jules.
Shes Asian and Jewish, which she talks about a fair amount.
Already shes on trend in theRHONYuniverse.
They live in Flatiron (Is that allowed on this show?)
above her husbands office.
And she believes in bribing her children.
Thats pretty much all we get.
Her staff look at her silently as if they dont know if theyre allowed to speak.
Seems like a really fun place to work!
Next its Caroles turn to have a meal with Ramona.
They mostly talk about dating and how Ramona is going out a bunch.
Ramona just apparently saw a re-gay band, which, of course, is actually a reggae band.
But she sure enjoyed their Brazilian music.
Dorinda is naturally wearing a fur vest with some sort of bedazzling involved.
He talks a lot about stains, which is just like a big nope.
Bethenny does not seem real into Jules since the new gal reminds her a lot of her mother.
If weve learned anything from Bethennys therapy sessions, its that she does not have fuzzy mommy feelings.
Thank God this show is back!
