Which of these on-screen horses would take home the trophy?
The Hollywood Derby
Happy Derby day!
But, what if the Hollywood horses got together in an epic Derby showdown of their own?
Buena Vista Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection
Ready to gamble on who would fly gallop into the sunset victorious?
Wed place our bets on this definitive ranking of first-past-the-post ponies.
Black Beauty
Bringing up the rear is that glossy-coated stallion, Black Beauty himself.
Keith Hamshere/Getty Images
Sorry, Beauty didnt anyone ever tell you nice horses finish last?
Place your bets if:Fancy manners are your thing.
At one point Beauty serves as a squire on a country estate,dah-ling!
John Bramley
But some of the thrill (and money) is lost when you opt for the predicted favorite.
Take a chance on an underhorse and the experience will be all the more rousing for it.
Place your bets if:You like to play it safe.
Buena Vista Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection
Place your bets if:Flared nostrils and the ability to outrun a sandstorm impress you.
Take note, Black Beauty.
Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron
This is a tricky one.
United Artists/Courtesy Everett Collection
That feisty Mustang isn’t called Spirit for nothing.
Then again, this is a fictional Derby so who says jockeys are even a requirement?
Spirit does love to run with others, though.
Dreamworks/courtesy Everett Collection
His favorite part of free stampeding with a pack?
“The hoofbeats were many but our hearts beat as one.”
Cute sentiment, Spirit, but not really conducive to competition.
Andrew Cooper, SMPSP
Place your bets if:You like to take risks.
In saying that, Spirit does jump over anentirecanyon.
With that level of agility, maybe it’s not such a leap of faith after all.
Pixar Animation Studios
If the power of a good cry equates winning in your eyes, this battle-weary bronco is your winner.
Place you bets if:Picking the horse just because it has a funny name is beneath you.
Plus, remember that tense scene at the end of the movie?
Francois Duhamel
That’s right, Bullseye not only carriesthreepeople toys, he also keeps pace with an airplane!
Place your bets if:Friends are the real champions in your eyes.
Hope is never lost with this champion.
Pierre Vinet
Plus, suffer an injury and need someone to share in the pain?
Seabiscuit will conveniently become injured at exactly the same time.
Gives a whole new meaning to the term “sympathy pains.”
Warner Bros.
Place your bets if:Animals are your “mane man.”
Aragorn’s horse Brego would.
Additional skills (not that they’re needed) include: battle prowess and being multi-lingual.
Place your bets if:You’re smart.
Just because a horse has an eaglehead/torsodoesn’t mean he’s disqualified.
There’s really only one word to explain Buckbeak’s victory in the 2016 Hollywood Derby: Wings.
Place your bets if:WINGS.
No further explanation necessary.
