‘‘This is the stuff you dream about,’’ said the sartorially challenged winner.

‘‘I’m not going to lie.

I’ve never seen all these people before!’’

Whoopi Goldberg, Golden Globes | Whoopi Goldberg, who won a Best Actress award for her role in The Color Purple , took the stage in a show-stopping bright yellow tracksuit,

Ron Galella/WireImage.com

‘‘I can’t believe it.

I’m shaking!’’

It’s harder to be a straight person all the way through.''

Marlee Matlin, Golden Globes | The hearing-impaired actress Marlee Matlin, who portrayed a deaf student in Children of a Lesser God , accepted her Best Actress award in sign language.

Ron Galella/WireImage.com

‘‘I’d like to thank…actually the makers of Kaopectate,’’ said Pitt.

‘‘They’ve done a great service for their fellow man.’’

Caught nowhere near the men’s room after the show, Pitt explained his choice.

Sigourney Weaver, Golden Globes | Sigourney Weaver racked up two awards in ‘89: Best Supporting Actress for Working Girl , and — as part of a three-way tie with Shirley

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‘‘I have a nervous stomach, and it works.

I’ll be expecting those calls from Kaopectate any minute now.’’

He still gives the funniest acceptance speeches in the history of showbiz.

Tom Hanks, Golden Globes | Tom Hanks, who won a Best Actor award for his role in Big , also pocketed laughs with this quip directed at the Hollywood Foreign

Ron Galella/WireImage.com

‘‘I am the Tom Hanks of the Golden Globes.’’

(Hanks won two Academy Awards in a row, forPhiladelphiain ‘94 andForrest Gumpin ‘95.)

After acting miffed that R.E.M.

Brad Pitt, Golden Globes | When Brad Pitt mounted the stage after winning the Best Supporting Actor award for 12 Monkeys , first on his thank-you list was not costar

Andrew Shawaf/Getty Images

As the crowd gasped and shouted for her to stop, Taylor, clearly confused (‘‘What?

I don’t open this?

‘'), ultimately had to get direction from Dick Clark.

Christine Lahti, Golden Globes | Christine Lahti had to be fetched from the ladies’ room to claim her Best Actress in a TV Drama prize (for Chicago Hope ). Cracked

Jeffrey Mayer/WireImage.com

The icing on the deliciously dotty cake: Her legendary announcement ofGlaaadiator!as the winner.

He also praised costar Kathy Bates, referring to her as ‘‘Bates Motel.’’

His explanation for his free-flowing wit: ‘‘I took a Valium tonight.’’

Golden Globes, Jack Lemmon, … | ‘‘I feel like being an artist is all about giving, and I’d like to give this to you, Mr. Jack Lemmon.’’ —Best Actor in a

Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic.com

Glad we can count on you, Jack.

‘‘I’m not from these parts,’’ he explained.

‘‘I’m from a little place called England.

Golden Globes, Jim Carrey | ‘‘I’m the establishments I once rejected.’’ —Best Actor in a Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy for Man on the Moon Watch it here

Jeffrey Mayer/WireImage.com

We used to launch the world before you.’’

He seemed just as surprised during his second win of the night, for Best Actor in a Comedy.

‘‘And I’m lucky enough tonight to have my father here with me.’’

Courtney Love, Golden Globes | Best song presenter Courtney Love both awed and cowed the audience when she showed up in a slashed-up blue Galliano dress that was a wardrobe

Luis Martinez/Getty Images

Could somebody pass the tissues?

The lucky name-drop recipients: Laurie’s script supervisor, his hairstylist, and his agent.

‘‘That’s not my handwriting,’’ Laurie said of the last slip of paper.

Elizabeth Taylor, Golden Globes | Anybody who’s watched a few awards shows knows there’s a protocol for presenters to follow: They’re supposed to get up on stage, crack a couple

Jerry Watson/Camera Press/Retna

‘‘This is early, I haven’t had a drink yet,’’ he fretted.

Among those he thanked was Jack Abramoff, the recently indicted Washington lobbyist.

A few folks in Washington may be wondering the same thing.

Edie Falco, Golden Globes | Edie Falco, winning for her role in The Sopranos , was literally speechless…with laryngitis. She was unable to thank anyone, but she made a valiant

Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic.com

(Washington reportedly used an anti-gay epithet about fellow cast member T.R.

Knight; those reports subsequently prompted Knight to come out publicly.)

Knight tried to lighten the mood by cracking in a goofy voice, ‘‘What fight?!’’

Jack Nicholson, Golden Globes | Jack Nicholson and the Golden Globes have been good to each other over the years. He’s won six trophies and a lifetime achievement award, and

Robert Mora/Getty Images

(Well, Mr. Washington, you kinda just did.)

Vary

2007: Most Outrageous Speech

Really, would you have expected less from theBoratstar?

Note toTaylor Swift: Winslet was there first.

Tim Robbins, Meryl Streep, … | Mystic River ’s Tim Robbins won the first trophy of the evening, and his comments set the tone for the night. ‘‘A good thing about

SGranitz/WireImage.com

Lanford Beard

2009: Best Acceptance Speech Middle Finger

Who doesn’t love Tina Fey?

BabsInLacrosse, DianeFan, and CougarLetter, that’s who.

Sadly, just three months later, James was revealed to be aphilanderer, and Bullock filed for divorce.

Ricky Gervais, Golden Globes | When Britcom The Office , on the little-seen BBC America cable channel, won an upset victory as Best Comedy Series, creator-star Ricky Gervais hardly knew

Chris Haston/NBC/WireImage.com

Lanford Beard

2011: Most Memorable Laugh

It was the chortle that launched a thousandmemes.

He totally wants to sleep with me!’’

He was met with bone-chilling glances and general A-list furor.

Jamie Foxx, Golden Globes | Some two hours into a disappointingly tame Globes telecast, and suddenly there was Jamie Foxx bringing a much-needed spark to the proceedings. His beautiful, meandering

Kevin Winter/Getty Images

In the end, all the uproar didn’t make a lick of difference.

Gervais waswelcomed backfor a threepeat in 2012.

One moment of genius?

Mariska Hargitay, Golden Globes | Law & Order: SVU ’s underrated Mariska Hargitay paid moving tribute to her late mother, legendary screen siren Jayne Mansfield, and her dad, Mickey Hargitay,

Kevin Winter/Getty Images

From Meryl Streep to Taylor Swift, no one was safe not even the Globes themselves.

Masterful, yet not mean.

Hugh Laurie, Golden Globes | Accepting the award for Best Actor in a Drama for his grouchy doctor role on Fox’s House , Hugh Laurie noted that he had 172

Kevin Winter/Getty Images

George Clooney, Golden Globes | George Clooney seemed unprepared to win the first award of the night, Best Supporting Actor (for playing a CIA agent stationed in the Middle East

Kevin Winter/Getty Images

Golden Globes | Backstage in the press room, the cast of Grey’s Anatomy was asked a question about a now-infamous dustup in the fall of ‘06 involving Patrick

Gabriel Bouys/AFP/Getty Images

Golden Globes, Sacha Baron Cohen | ‘‘I saw a dark part of America, a part of America that rarely sees the light of day. I refer of course to the anus

Paul Drinkwater/NBCU Photo Bank via AP Images

Kate Winslet, Golden Globes | The sixth time was a charm for Kate Winslet, who took home twin trophies for her roles in Revolutionary Road and The Reader . During

Paul Drinkwater/AP Images

Tina Fey, Golden Globes | Who doesn’t love Tina Fey? BabsInLacrosse, DianeFan, and CougarLetter, that’s who. During her Best Actress thank-yous, the 30 Rock star marveled at the great year

Paul Drinkwater/AP Images

Sandra Bullock, Golden Globes | Hollywood’s own Miss Congeniality Sandra Bullock was a shoo-in for Best Actress thanks to her scrappy role in The Blind Side . She gave a

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Natalie Portman, Golden Globes | It was the chortle that launched a thousand memes . When pregnant Natalie Portman took the stage to accept her Best Actress statuette for Black

Paul Drinkwater/NBCU Photo Bank via AP Images

Ricky Gervais, Golden Globes | With a lager on the podium and a veritable suicide bomb of a monologue in his heart, Ricky Gervais took the stage for a second

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Golden Globe Awards 2012 | Collecting her second Best Actress in a Drama Series trophy, Homeland star Claire Danes wasted no time making up for two very important omissions from

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Overly high expectations? No such thing! Amy Poehler and Tina Fey killed it with their monologue and didn’t stop until Argo ’s literal 11th-hour win

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