But don’t let the finery fool you: Westeros is a graveyard.
A lone survivor flees south and gets killed by Ned Stark, our apparent hero.
Remember the first sighting of King’s Landing in the pilot?
Credit: Macall B. Polay/HBO
It’s a funeral.
There lies Jon Arryn, eyes wide shut.
His death is the inciting incident for everything that has happened.
(It took four seasons to find out who killed him.
His wife confessed and then died.)
Or maybe Jon Arryn was just a symptom.
Maybe everything that happens onGame of Throneswas inevitable.
In the pilot, King Robert Baratheon and Warden of the North Eddard Stark visit the Winterfell crypt.
Robert remembers friends and enemies long gone: beloved Lyanna Stark, hated Rhaegar Targaryen.
“Dead” is never “gone” onGame of Thrones.
They’re marching South as we speak.
SoThronescomes by its death fixation honestly.
It’s in the show’s DNA.
Ten years ago next week,Lostaired an episode called “Two for the Road.”
The episode ends with a scene involving three characters: Ana Lucia, Libby, and Michael.
screamed a top volume.
Was there a way to turn three negatives into a positive?
In a twist with zero build-up, Michael grabbed a gun and shot Ana Lucia and Libby dead.
RELATED VIDEO:Burning questions from the premiere
“Character not working?
Kill ‘em off!”
That brutal calculus poweredLostand24, rescuedWalking Dead, has caused at least four Shondaland mid-series reboots.
And that’s the hilarious subtext to the standout sequence in last night’s premiere.
Elsewhere, Doran’s son Trystane faces off against Sporty Snake and Baby Snake.
They challenge him to a duel.
He accepts, thinking he’s facing honorable people.
Just as he’s about to strike, Sporty Snake stabs him through the back of his head.
None of these characters are particularly exciting.
But hey: Half of them are dead now!
But the Sand Snake problem was a real problem.
In season 5, the Martells were only the most obvious newbies lacking something essential.
Across the show’s world, soliloquizing zealots devoted to some God or other were pontificating.
But I’m not sure that master arc played to the soapy, pulp strengths of whatThroneshas become.
And I’m not sure the sixth season premiere immediately solved last season’s problems.
But the Boltons are grotesque, lacking the added dimensions of the brutal-and-brutalized Lannisters.
Meanwhile, in Meereen has any phrase ever felt more like a threat?
As of this first episode, that’s only partially true.
(We’ll know next week?
But Meereen still lacks the texture of options like King’s Landing and Winterfell.
Into Tyrion’s mouth, the showrunners placed a signpost for the season ahead.
MaybeGame of Thrones biggest asset has also been its biggest problem.
Anxiety of influence can halt momentum, or forestall it.
Brienne rescued Sansa, pairing Gwendoline Christie’s devotional swagger along Sophie Turner’s quiet desperation.
And in King’s Landing, Jaime Lannister had some thoughts on destiny.
“F prophecy!”
“F fate!”
Maybe that was a bit of meta-commentary, too.
