You’ve been warned.
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: Mr. Deadpool, youre often referred to as an anti-hero.
How do you feel about that label?
Credit: VancityReynolds/Twitter.com
DEADPOOL: Labels are for jars.
I keep my enemies organs in mine.
Marilyn Monroe was born Norma Jean Mortenson.
Tina Turner was Anna Mae Bullock.
Who was Wade Wilson, the man you used to be?
Wade Wilson was in fact, Tina Turner.
Youve been nicknamed The Merc with a Mouth.
Is your mouth your best feature?
If not, what is?
Curiously, my ahole has the brighter smile.
Your movie stalled a number of times before being greenlit in 2014.
What was the lowest point for you?
I once had aggressive, middle-of-the-night anonymous sex in a public park with several U.S.
But the low point?
The film received an R rating for strong violence and language throughout, sexual content, and graphic nudity.
Whats the most offensive thing about it?
There is absolutely nothing offensive about this movie.
In the future, it will be used in kindergartens to shape tiny minds into wholesome soldiers of God.
Have you ever seen the Clint Eastwood movieThe Dead Pool?
Do you worry fans may confuse the two?
kindly… Not even Clint Eastwood saw that film.
You are pals with Wolverine.
What does he smell like?
I only know what he tastes like.
Do you get starstruck by other superheroes?
Whos your superhero crush?
Peter Parker is by far the most impressive member of One Direction.
Many of your superhero colleagues like Captain America and Thor avoid the topic of sex.
Do you have any tips for them?
I only have one tip for them.
So theyre gonna have to share.
You named your Katana swords afterGolden Girlsactress Bea Arthur.
Why is she more alluring than Betty White or Rue McClanahan?
Could she be less alluring?
Betty White makes me swoon.
Whats your secret for staying in shape?
My first girlfriend was named Shape… And trust me, it wasnt a secret.
Youve said that Vanessa is the great love of your life.
What romantic couple have you modeled yourselves after?
Colossus, an acquaintance of yours from X-Men, is made of organic stainless steel.
Do magnets stick to him?
Havent tried the magnet thing, though that sounds cool.
Ill get back to you.
Whatdoesstick to him is his reputation as an insufferable, long-winded prude.
Your main superpower is your ability to regenerate after injuries.
What would you change about your appearance if you could?
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
In your comics you often speak directly to the reader.
What kind of art do you hang on your fourth wall?
What are you, some kind of idiot?
Youve described yourself as a lapsed Catholic.
So, if heaven exists, what do you hope God is wearing when you enter the Pearly Gates?
Nothing but a very light spackling of baby powder.
And maybe a pair of sturdy boots.
Your job is pretty stressful.
How do you unwind after a long day?
Reclined on my papasan, listening to the soft cries underneath my crawl space.
Whats the last movie that made you cry?
Which childhood memory comes up most often for you during therapy?
Id need crude sock puppets and a sh ton of tissue to get into that.
Red is obviously your favorite color.
Whats your favorite word?
You always profess your love chimichangas.
Whats the key to a great one?
And can you recommend a Mexican restaurant?
Part fluff, part crunch.
Tee Pee, Phoenix, Arizona.
Its an election year and people are making big promises.
Do you think you and your movie can Make America Great Again?
AMERICA IS ALREADY GREAT.
WHY DO YOU THINK I LEFT CANADA?
Youre known for being so honest.
Is there anything youre afraid to talk about?
Not one goddamn thing is off-limits.
Kinda like peoples Facebook profiles.
Will you attend the Oscars this year or have you joined the boycott?
Lets just say the red carpet will match the drapes.
Youve had a cult following since 1991.
Are you prepared for mainstream fame?
I just had my lips done.
